The Etiquette of Abandoned Stories

FiMFiction is littered with stories marked CANCELED or ON HIATUS (and let's face it, the latter means the former so often that most readers see the two as synonymous within the realm of fanfic).  It's also littered with stories marked INCOMPLETE, which haven't updated since 2012.

There's absolutely nothing unexpected about any of that.  As long as fanfiction is a (nearly) zero-barrier-to-entry, (mostly) remuneration-free field, authors will get in over their heads, start something they don't know how to finish, or just run out of the time, energy, or interest needed to finish their stories.  Abandoned stories aren't a problem that needs to be fixed...

...But it sure would be nice if authors could all agree to a few simple bits of etiquette as regards them.  My suggestions, below the break.

Episode Talk: S5E5, Tanks for the Memories

I had a ton of stuff to do this weekend, and I did almost none of it.  I watched some hockey, it's true, and I finished some reading I needed to get done by Monday, but that was it.  Yard?  Nope.  Cleaning the living room?  Please.  Grocery shopping?  Eh, I can live off cans of stuff from the pantry for a few more days.

I did manage to make time to watch the new MLP episode, though!  Click down below the break for some thoughts on it, post-48-hour cooldown.

First Sentences in (Fan)Fiction the 5th

On Wednesday, the NHL playoffs suffered their first casualty, and the playoff/fanfic bracket lost its first story: Horse Voice's Biblical Monsters was swept in four games by My Little Dashie (or, if you prefer, Winnipeg was knocked out by Anaheim).  Once the first round is done I'll update you on second-round matchups (my plan was to only do end-of-round updates, and going forward it still is), but I thought I'd take a moment to acknowledge the only team/story this year that failed/will fail to win a single game.  Well, that's what you get for *mumble mumble*-ing *mumble mumble*, I guess!

With disastrous endings out of our way, though, let's talk about beginnings!  Hopefully not the disastrous kind, though I suppose there's only one way to find out.  My thoughts on the first sentences of some of the recent Fandom Classics, below the break.

Mini-Reviews Round 79

I don't normally pay much attention to Equestria Daily polls, but I want you all to know I'm very disappointed in this recent result:

Characters like Vinyl or Lyra topping the poll?  Sure, whatever, I get it--not everyone can have great taste.  But How does Carrot Top get only 0.63% of the vote?  How does she rank behind Berry Punch, aka "wine joke that the show will literally never make because it's for kids"?  How does she rank behind Flitter, aka "I think she's from Hurricane Fluttershy, maybe?"?  How does she rank behind Blossomforth, aka "...Wait, which one is she, I literally don't even know which background pony she is"?  Seriously, I just googled Blossomforth, and I still don't remember where she's from.

And she still beat Carrot Top in this stupid poll.  Fandom, you disappoint me.  Whatever; short-form reviews follow, enjoy it (if you're capable of appreciating good things, which barely 100 of you apparently are).

Fandom Classics Part 106: A Draconequus’ Guide to Immortality

To read the story, click the image or follow this link

Against my expectations, it turns out that a fair few of you do have some passing interest in hockey, at least when it's used as a vehicle for fanfic humor(ish-ness).  Keep an eye on this bit above the break--I'll irregularly update y'all on who's been eliminated over the next couple of months.  Fair warning, though: the bracket I larked up ends up giving best odds to some of the worst stories.  But I suppose that's as it should be--you ought to be upset when the Rangers win, after all!

Anyway, click down below the break for my totally non-hockey-related review of Argonmatrix's A Draconequus’ Guide to Immortality.

Something That Will Literally Only Interest Me

I'm sure I'm not breaking any news when I tell you that I'm a fan of MLP, and of fanfic thereof.  If you don't read the above-the-break blurbs with attention, though, you might not be aware that I'm also a bit of a hockey fan.  Well, the Stanley Cup Playoffs™® are finally upon us, and so I decided to do something that I thought would be fun, and that anyone who doesn't share both of those interests will probably find incomprehensible at best.  Click below the break for my Playoff Fanfic Analogues, and follow your favorite fanfic on its Cup run!

Mini-Reviews Round 78

I know most of you will have seen this already, but there's been a minor kerfuffle recently over a certain website hosting (and charging for) peoples' fanfics without their permission or knowledge.  More information can be found here if you want to make sure your story or stories aren't among the appropriated, along with info on how to get said stories taken down if they are.

Of my stuff, it turns out that The Purloined Pony is available there, at least for the time being.  So, if you've ever wanted to pay for the privilege of reading my fanfic, now's your chance!  Of course, you wouldn't be paying me, but I'm sure the sketchy hippy (an IP check turns up San Francisco; no reason to trust that, particularly, but I like to imagine he's a sketchy hippy (and a he)) who runs the site would appreciate it.

Anyway, reviews!  All after the break, just enter your credit card number in the comment section to view.  I totally promise to bill you*

*Technically, it's not a "bill" if I just empty your account, right?

Fandom Classics Part 105: Heart to Heart

To read the story, click the image or follow this link

Holy cow, two good episodes in a row!  While a bit predictable (and while I'm not sure I'd feel at home in a place with the decaying remnants of my blown-up former house suspended over my head...), there was a lot of good humor in Castle Sweet Castle.  Okay, mostly I just love Bulk Biceps/Roid Rage/Snowflake/whatever his name is these days having a day job as an x-treme masseuse.  And having opposable pecs, which is amazing.  Couple that with Dash being Dash, Angel Bunny being fluffbally, and Fluttershy continuing to exhibit character growth without suffering character assassination, and I'm pretty darn happy with the first couple weeks of season 5.

But enough episode yakking.  Let's yak about fanfics!  My review of Crosis's Heart to Heart, after the break.

Mini-Reviews Round 77

Writing posts for Fridays is kind of a draining experience.  Usually I end up writing them midweek, and then when I finish the post I have a brief moment of "Hallelujah, no more responsibilities until Monday!" followed immediately by the crushing realization that, wait, today's Wednesday, the weekend's still two full days away.  Maybe I should try to get exactly one week ahead, so that my post-writing days and post-posting days line up.  Or maybe I should just do everything at the very last second; that seems like a perfect way to eliminate any stress, doesn't it?

So, yeah.  Mini-reviews!  Click below the break to see what I thought of some stories I read recently.

Fandom Classics Part 104: Stardust

To read the story, click the image or follow this link

A slightly-belated welcome home, everyone who went to Babscon (which was, apparently, every author I follow and then some).  From what I read, it sounds like it was a lot of fun!  Also, that reminds me that I need to see what's happening with MLP-MSP, a.k.a. "That con that's close enough that I can actually attend it."  Woo, human interaction!

But enough about real people; let's talk about imaginary ones for a while!  My review of Arad's Stardust awaits, below the break.

Episode Talk: S5E1-2, Cutie Map

Hey, new pony episodes!  And that means a chance to talk about new pony episodes!

It's been a while, so a quick refresher: I don't comment on every episode, only the ones where I have at least a few things I want to say.  By the time this goes up (two days after the episode premiered) we've hopefully gotten the hottest of the hot takes out of the way, which is nice.  And note that this post isn't intended as an analysis of the episode (there are plenty of youtubers on the job already, I'm sure) so much as a collection of my thoughts and impressions, hopefully arranged into something approaching coherency.  With that all said, click down below the break to see what I thought of Cutie Map.

For a Change, Let's Talk About Actual Books (Part 17)

Have a happy Easter, everyone!

...I had no follow-up for that.  Ah well; let's just move on.  Click down below the break to see what I'm reading at the moment, and what I'm thinking of it so far.

Mini-Reviews Round 76

It's April first again, and once again, no pranks here.  I just don't get why you would try to prank someone on the first; that's the one time they'll automatically be suspicious of anything you say!  Much better to save any good ideas you have another few weeks, then spring them on some poor, unsuspecting saps.  Anyway, if you're done gawking at all the "hilarious" fake news and posts that are no doubt dominating your favorite sites even as we speak, click down below the break for my thoughts on three recently-read stories.