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Friday, April 25, 2014

Fandom Classics Part 48: Twilight Sparkle: Night Shift

To read the story, click the image or follow this link

We're trying something new today: spoilered star ratings!  In order to prevent your roving eye from taking in the 1-5 number before you've properly steeled yourself, you'll now have to click the show/hide box to view it.  If you have strong opinions about this being a positive or negative change, let me know.  Otherwise, enjoy my review of JawJoe's Twilight Sparkle: Night Shift, safe in the knowledge that you needn't see those stars until you're good and ready for them.



Impressions before reading:  Although it's as easy to muck up as anything else, I've always been fond of the "the masquerade" as a premise; the idea that there's a dark, usually undead-filled world to which only a few are privy, and which is (either voluntarily or forcibly) kept from the awareness of the average person, is one that provides plenty of potential for action, intrigue, mystery, and drama.  So right off the bat, I'm interested to see how this take on Twilight having a secret life plays out.

Zero-ish spoiler summary:  In the years since her parents' untimely death, Twilight has filled her sleepless nights with work for the Night Shift: a shadowy organization run by Princess Luna, dedicated to keeping demons, vampires, and the like from harassing Equestrians.  But she finds that there are some disturbing connections among her jobs, which all seem to be part of something much, much larger...

(worth noting: this fic was begun before season 3; set your expectations for canon-following accordingly)

Thoughts after reading:  There are a lot of dark fics in this fandom, and some of them are extremely good (there's a sentence that says something!).  And one thing all good dark fics must address in some way is how to reconcile their tone with, well, My Little Pony.  Finding a way to place dark events in Equestria is the primary challenges specific to the genre, in fact.

Night Shift does a reasonable job of explaining Twilight's grim cynicism, but where it falls short is in its portrayals of Equestria at large.  JawJoe paints a very bleak picture of Equestria generally, and there is not a single major or minor character here who doesn't have a tortured past, deep-seated self-loathing, serious emotional baggage, a history of physical and/or emotional violence, or all of the above.  Even the most "lighthearted" of characters, such as eternal drag-along (and vampire) Vinyl Scratch, are saddled with plenty of guilt, heavy-hanging deeds, and most of all, cynicism.

In fact, "cynical" is perhaps the best word to describe this story.  Every single character in it shows a tremendous amount of world-weary, jaundiced pessimism towards... pretty much everything, really.  For any individual character, this works; again, Twilight's given a perfectly good reason for acting the way she does.  But when this extends to literally every character in a large cast, then the constant bleakness not only becomes wearying, but also draws an uncomfortably clear distinction between this story and the setting it's nominally making use of.  Simply put, this doesn't feel like Equestria after a while.

That's a shame, because there are a lot of things here that worked individually.  Trixie's role in the story adds a pleasant level of snark to an already-interesting arc (although she ultimately succumbs to the fic's need for everyone to have a tragic, grim history), for example, and in fact almost all of the individual arcs are well-paced and interesting.  The notable exception is a, for lack of a better term, dream sequence which drags on through fully a fifth of the fic's verbiage; despite having lots of important character stuff, I felt pretty strongly that 1) the same could have been expressed in half the words without any loss due to compression, and 2) the sheer length of that sequence dramatically bogged down what was, otherwise, a story which made good use of alternating action and building tension.

Although the various arcs may have worked for me, I found the mystery of what connected them less enthralling.  A lot of this was that I was bothered on more than one occasion by Twilight seemingly reaching conclusions based on the author's knowledge of where events were leading, rather than anything that was in the story or based on her past knowledge.  I felt like I had to spend a fair bit of time playing catch-up to Twilight, not because I'd forgotten some key detail, but because the only way to guess what her motive was was to project ahead to what the next revelation or two would be (For example, trying to figure out why Twilight was shocked that Luna would go to such lengths to protect somepony's "terrible secret"... when said pony's terrible secret hadn't been revealed, or even directly suggested, to that point).  However, the ultimate explanation was one I found interesting, suitably dramatic and grandiose, and generally satisfying.  It's true that the ending is also awfully hollow, with the primary conflict more "put on the back burner" than permanently solved, but there is at least a hint that the characters can go back to being... well, to being the broken cynics they started the story as, anyway.

Star rating:


Leaving aside the possibility that I was biased by the fact that, not three paragraphs in, this story is already taking pot shots at CYOAs, I just found this story wearying.  The best dark fics, it seems to me, retain an essential optimism about them; whether they ultimately reward or brutally subvert that optimism depends on the story, but there's at least a ray of hope as you read.  Night Shift isn't so much grim as it is, well, cynical, through and through.  Every character, every situation, the entire setting is positively suffused with a shrugging assurance that optimism is a fools game, and that it will be (and is) eternally unrewarded.  And when there's not a single bit of respite from all that cynicism, it makes it hard to enjoy the finished product.

Recommendation:  Although there's surprisingly little humor in this story, considering how snarky Twilight initially comes off, this one might still be worth reading for those who like gallows humor and is looking for a well-plotted conspiracy/apocalypse.  People put off by incomplete-feeling endings or tonal malaise will probably be happier with something else.

Next time:  Post Nuptials, by Darth Link 22

21 comments:

  1. Post Nuptials huh? I gave it a thumbs up when I first found it while it was being written (chapter 2 or 3 IIRC) but I have a hunch that you will come to the same conclusion about it as I did.

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  2. "... there is not a single major or minor character here who doesn't have a tortured past, deep-seated self-loathing, serious emotional baggage, a history of physical and/or emotional violence, or all of the above."

    Ugh... yeah, I have absolutely no interest in reading this one. That just sounds terrible. Shame this had to be the first time the star rating was hidden. I was hoping for one a little closer on the decision of whether to read it or not, to see how much your ratings might be influencing me

    Seeing the spoiler box was a little strange, but I imagine that's just 'cause (as a conservative white male) I'm generally weird about change. This seems like a good one, so I'm sure I'll get used to it in no time

    Turn and face the strange...

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  3. "People put off by incomplete-feeling endings or tonal malaise will probably be happier with something else."

    Like the plague, I be avoiding it.

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  4. I keep licking my screen but nothing is happening. D:

    I might actually skip this one, if it's already on my to-read.

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    Replies
    1. Damn it, how'd I miss that? It was friggin' gold!

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    2. Unless you actually licked your screen, I refuse to feel even a little bit bad about that one.

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    3. It tasted like sadness and cheese.

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    4. I'm feeling a bit dumb here but...

      What the actual fudge?

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    5. The post initially instructed the reader to "lick the hide/show box". :B

      Also I was too busy making sofunny joeks to mention that I like spoilering the star rating. :D It's a good idea and it works well in practice. (I always had a tendency to scroll down too far and see it was before I'd finished reading.) Now go back and do 'em all! :3

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  5. Glad I didn't miss much by stopping fairly soon in my reading of this.

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  6. This fic resembles a lot one of those 13 episodes anime, from the structure to the character portrayals, including the nightmare fuel filled final arc, and the bitter sweet can-be-continued-but-probably-not ending.

    I disagree, however, that the ending was incomplete. The fundamental conflict of the story is Twilight coming to terms with her new life, and while she doesn't return to how she was before the events that started that, she does reach a new, more stable status-quo.

    What really bothered me was Luna. She was irrational and unjustified in her actions in every turn, in a way that felt extremely contrived, and even the post-hoc justifications felt horned in.

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  7. I dropped that story about 5 chapters in. I felt the author seriously does not acknowledge that the Night Shift is an evil organization. Its primary purpose is covering up threats so that Luna's Night doesn't get a bad reputation - wiping minds over things mundane for the setting, like overuse of telekinesis making object animate and try to kill you. The first thing we learn is that vampires are free to prey on lower classes and infect them with a deadly gaggle of diseases, but attacking a high class pony that causes questions to be asked is punished by death.

    And yet, the story seems to treat the organisation as just sort of dark and gritty "somebody's gotta do this" sort of deal. Maybe there's a conspiracy, but the Shift itself isn't inherently wrong. Bonus points on not questioning Luna's insanity in the no harming zombies rule - what are you, Ponies In Black or the Catholic Church?

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  8. Between the review and all the comments, I'm getting a lot of warning signs that I should probably drop this from my reading list, but whether I will, I'm not sure yet. I kind of want to give it a chance regardless, if only because the concept just sounds so intriguing. I guess I'll just watch the comments here and see if anybody else who read enough of it can sway my opinion either way.

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    Replies
    1. Same.
      Neither Griffin nor Chris enjoyed this one, so I really don't expect to make it through more than a few chapters before skipping to the end and then forgetting it.

      Delete
  9. Huh. So there is what amounts to a World of Darkness Inquisition fic for MLP. You live and learn.

    Given that the lack of hope and goodness is my main sticking point with the WoD (which is why Mage: the Ascension is "my" system), I'm not going to touch this one. I likely wouldn't have done so either way, but I do get curious about "dark" stories from time to time (and usually have cause to regret that curiosity shortly afterwards). Thanks for saving my time on this one.

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    Replies
    1. There's at least one more: one of Estee's "Tales of the Canterlot Deportation Agency" stories (http://www.fimfiction.net/story/179708/tales-of-the-canterlot-deportation-agency-bree).

      Delete
  10. "Post Nuptials" is another fic that I apparently upvoted but can't remember much about. Maybe I'm just getting old.
    I do recall feeling utterly unmotivated to read the sequel, though.

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  11. Chris, thank you for spoilertagging the rating, even though it's inconvenient; I really appreciate it. This is the first time I've actually read a full review of your's in at least a year.

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  12. Ah, I remember this story. I gave it a go, then got distracted by... bread, or something and left it on my 'To Read List'. I had honestly forgotten it existed.

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  13. I decided to go ahead with what I considered doing in Minuette's Lesson, going through the 'fandom classic' reviews and commenting, and it should be up on #1.

    Anyway, I'm not looking forward to when I get to this one, I like dark fics, but only when they have some other message to impart than 'life sucks, let's all be cynical together'. (Is that the correct grammar? I always forget.)

    When I read a dark story, it's because I want something that can have some sort of impact on reality, as opposed to normal stories which are more fantastic. The best dark stuff I've read are things that have at least some optimism, even if that optimism is crushed, because that hits home for me in a way that a joyless story (at least what your review paints the story has) like this could never do.

    Judging by both the comments and the review, I'm going to put this one off until I get up to it in my reading of the 'fandom classics'. I don't think I'm going to be very happy with it regardless. Also, thank you for spoilering the star rating, I'm going to try to avoid seeing it until after I've read the fic and this helps a lot on that front.

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  14. I'll be honest, I loved this story. Yes it was dark, unnecessarily so at times, but the creativity and writing skills of the author more than made up for that.

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